“11 o’clock and all’s we—ell…!” So it begins, my nocturnal studies of the Internet – of Facebook,the news and far too many celebrity gossip sites – whilst my son, my lamb, my imp, my toad, my darling little cabbage end (mon p’tit bout d’chou) has the first of several late night snacks. We generally check up on each other once every couple of hours or so, and my son is fastidious in his endeavours to make sure that I do not pine too long for his company, during his brief absences. The problem with this arrangement is that I now model a classic zombie look, no doubt jaw-droppingly effective for special occasions (ruling Hallowe’en, scaring away potential burglars, showing disapproval at queue-jumpers…), but not quite the thing for everyday use.
We have been having these late-night tête-à-têtes without interruption for the past eight months, and, although I have tried, with varying degrees of politeness, to persuade the little crapaud (“croak, croak!”) that, as much as I adore hanging out with him all day, every day (sans nap) it would be beneficial to us both to have a few hours of peace to ourselves during the night, he has largely ignored me and continues to summon me at whim.
In the interests of preserving what little remains of my sanity, I have realised that I have two options before me: I can either hurl my ‘phone through our enormous dining room window, watch the glass shatter and listen to the satisfying crash, and then launch myself through the gap and run, screaming, for the hills (tempting, and definitely manageable given that I live halfway up a very small mountain, so only minimal effort need be involved), OR…I can vent to the world at large and whinge to my heart’s content (ah! the beauty of the internet). After some hesitation I have decided to try the latter option first (largely because it involves less clearing up), and to save my Olympic Shot Put dreams for another day.
And so…voila! Bienvenue and welcome to this, the maiden voyage of my blog. If you have stumbled upon me by accident and are wondering where you are and who I am, please allow me to introduce myself….
I am a stay-at-home mother to one small child (so far), living with my husband in the French countryside, not too far from Switzerland. I left the UK five years ago for a four month adventure abroad, and am still here now. I am, then, competing for the title of the world’s longest ‘Gap Year-er’, as we have every intention of staying here for good, and raising “Franglais” offspring. We live in an old farmhouse,which we are in the never-ending process of renovating, with a cat, three chickens (the ‘Coos’), and an ancient rat, called Daisy.
Welcome, then, to the ramblings of a frazzled Brit abroad…à bientôt and good night!
Mots du jour:
Allons-y! – Let’s go! un bout de chou – term of endearment for a little child (meaning literally ‘a cabbage end’ and used frequently by my husband) un crapaud – a toad à bientôt! See you soon!